Sparring Basics

Say your having a conversation with your neighbor. You insist the neo-conservatives are behind the Iraq War and you start naming people and documents to back up your point. He laughs and dismisses you as nothing more than another conspiracy theorist. You however are well aware that this neighbor could not name the Vice-President of the U.S., let alone know of William Kristol, Richard Perle, or Donald Rumsfeld.
So you start another tactic. You mention no WMD or no links to Al Qaeda. Your neighbor goes into a story about a friend of a friend who has a soldier friend and this guy actually found WMD in Iraq, and not only that but poor George Bush is taking all this bad publicity because he can't really tell this fact to the American people for some odd reason or other, then he says, "Why are you such a negative person?"
Now you're steamed. You want to start the cycle of name calling and you start shaking your head. You're on the verge of an emotional eruption.
Allow me to refer you to some good advice from a wise Buddhist Lama on how to work with insults and anger.
Enjoy your week, its sure to be another forehead slapper.

'When someone insults us, we usually dwell on it, asking ourselves, "Why did he say that to me?" and on and on. It's as if someone shoots an arrow at us, but it falls short. Focusing on the problem is like picking up the arrow and repeatedly stabbing ourselves with it saying, "He hurt me so much. I can't believe he did that." Instead, we can use the method of contemplation to think things through differently, to change our habit of reacting with anger. Imagine that someone insults you. Say to yourself, "This person makes me angry. But what is anger? It is one of the poisons of the mind that creates negative karma, leading to intense suffering. Meeting anger with anger is like following a lunatic who jumps off a cliff. Do I have to do likewise? While it's crazy for him to act the way he does, it's even crazier for me to do the same." Chagdud Tulku

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